Ole Blue Eyes

January 9th. As of today, we’ve officially spent as much time at home as we spent in the hospital. Wow. The first 5 months were in slow motion. I remember thinking that first week in the NICU how LONG we had to go and how FAR Tucker needed to come. These last 5 months? Flown by. And in these 5 months, Tucker has grown himself a big. fat. personality.

He is very curious. About things. About what we’re doing. About my phone. And the computer. I love when we hear Tucker stirring in the morning. We look over and see his little head popped up, pushed up on his arms as far as he can go, straining to see us, and the day ahead. His blue eyes barely peeking over the side of the pack n play. (yes, still in our room-don’t judge). It is exactly what I couldn’t let myself imagine 7-8-9 months ago when his little blue eyes were fused shut and I was looking at him through plexi glass. I hurried time along in those days. I wanted him to grow. Develop. Get outta there with as little emotional and physical scarring as possible. I don’t hurry the days away now.

How far we’ve all come. Here are some reflections from our 5 months at home:

1. Babies are resilient
2. God is Sovereign
3. Tucker has a sideways grin that will melt you
4. Isolation is not so bad
5. Isolation is really hard
6. Parental love is fierce
7. Darrin+Heather? We work. 5 months, just the two of us cooped up in one room at RMH followed by 5 months, just the two of us cooped up at home in isolation. And we still share the remote. We work.
8. Tucker amazes us. Every. Single Day.
9. “Breastfeeding will melt that weight right off”=BOLD FACE LIE
10. We cannot get enough of Tucker’s laugh. Even after he’s eaten. And he’s probably going to get the hiccups if we don’t stop making him laugh. Can’t stop.
11. This whole 10 months has been hard for our family.
12. And our friends. Please hang in there with us for a few more months
13. I miss the cookies at Ronald McDonald House
14. Amazon Prime is maybe the best thing ever.
15. Tucker calms down when you sing him Jingle Bells.
16. The blue bulb that has been used for generations to suction a baby’s nose gets the best of me every time. Seriously-HOW do you get him to be still?
17. Thank you God, for giving Tucker Mickey’s chin dimple. I (and Darrin even more) wish very much that he were here to see his little miracle grandson.
18. I sneak and kiss his chin dimple. A lot.
19. How can a 16 pound baby need 700 pounds of stuff?
20. Hand washing should be an Olympic sport
21. Sometimes I want to freeze time now so that Tucker stays exactly this age which is so sweet and sometimes I want to peek into the future to see what his story has next.
22. Tucker doesn’t seem to love watching basketball as much as football. This could be a problem.
23. Normally my lists have perfect nice, even numbers. I’ve found a lot of freedom in giving up perfection lately 🙂

We had a good visit at the hearing exam. They did 3 tests. Two were “functional” tests which checked Tucker’s inner ear and middle ear to make sure they were functionally doing what they should-and they are. Then they did another test that was more behavioral-we sat in a booth with two speakers and TV’s on either side of the room. Then, the doctor (outside the booth, we couldn’t see) would play different sounds in one of the two speakers along with a picture on the screen. I held him on my lap and didn’t speak or react at all. The object was for Tucker to hear the sound and look in the direction from which the sound came. The whole test took about 10 minutes or so. He did well with this except for the more hushed, quiet sounds, which were toward the end. The doctor said this could be because at that point, he was over it and more interested in other things (like his feet-good gracious, he’s obsessed) or he may actually not have heard the sounds.

We’ll go back in 3 months and re-do the test, by then, he can hopefully tolerate earphones and it will be easier to analyze. If you remember from an earlier post, he has a few risk factors for hearing loss (some of the meds he took in the NICU, the fact that he was on the vent and just his severe prematurity). But, the doctor was encouraged by what she saw, so that is good news. He’ll get these exams until he’s about 3 years old.

Took his RSV shot #3 like a champ last week so…no more appointments this month-yay! And officially, he’s passed the 6 month adjusted age date and his eyes are still blue, so…looks like these two brown eyed Hucks produced a blue eyed cutie! Go figure.  Hope you’re having a good week.

We still miss you and we have a few prayer requests:

1. Pray for Tucker’s milestones (specifically speech and sitting up)
2. Pray for protection from any sickness
3. Pray for the Patwah family. I don’t know this family, but my good friend Jen is a dear friend of Amy Patwah, who this week, passed away from breast cancer leaving behind a husband and young daughter. Please lift them up in prayer. You can read a beautifully written post from Jen about Amy and her amazing faith and also see a video about Amy here: http://www.jenpluschris.com/amy-charis-give-me-jesus/
4. Pray for fellow former micro, Pierce. Pierce, as a result of his prematurity and like many, many micros, had a brain bleed when he was in the NICU and developed hydrocephalus, which required a brain shunt that he still has today. His parents just learned that he may require another shunt but they have the unspeakably hard decision to make between several surgical options-none of them great at this point. Please pray for clarity. You can read about Pierce at http://www.littlebabypierce.blogspot.com/
5. Remember Kenna? That I asked you to pray for a couple weeks ago? She is home from the hospital and today, turned 1! Thanks God!

“Before they call I will answer; while they are yet speaking I will hear.” Isaiah 25:64