We rounded the corner after scrubbing in for the obligatory 3 minutes. As we neared the fourth pod, I saw that the neonatologist was sitting on a stool right beside Tucker’s isolette. We were only 4 days new to the NICU experience. But I knew enough to know that if the neonatologist was camped out at our isolette, it probably wasn't good news. We walked up and I peered in at the teeny 1 pounder. The impossibly small human behind the plexiglass was jerking his twig thin leg, in an unnatural ... View the Post
I Packed A Bag
When will I stop packing a bag? I threw it together in 4 minutes. It sat in the backseat. A change of clothes, 2 sets of Tucker's pj's. His favorite books, some toys and of course, his sidekick Snoopy. I had just gotten off the phone with the pediatrician, "Yes", she'd said, "I want to see him.". My message to the triage nurse had gone something like this: "Hi, this is Tucker's mom, he sees Dr So and So. He's a former 24 weeker. He's had a cold for 5 days. It's not getting better. I listen to ... View the Post
The Other Side
"There are moments that mark your life. Moments when you realize nothing will ever be the same and time is now divided into two parts, "Before this." and "After this." -Author unknown We're 30 days and counting. Isolation is technically over on April 1st in our region. For a micro preemie, typically 2 seasons of isolation is the recommendation and so this will be the last for us. As we approach the breakout date, I find my brain and heart full of thoughts. Tucker came home from the hospital ... View the Post
The Scrub Room
Week 1. We had started to corral all the foreign routines that were to become our life for the next 5 months. Showing our hospital bracelets to the receptionist. Remembering to bring the syringes of breast milk. Sorting out the faces between nurse, respiratory therapist, neonatologist, nurse practitioner, lactation specialist and social worker. Deciphering the monitor alarms from 'this is not good' to 'this is normal' to 'the nurses are running'. And of course, learning the ritual of scrubbing ... View the Post
Tucker’s Room
The 7th floor. It was a contradiction of space. At Presbyterian Hemby Children's Hospital, there are only 2 reasons you go to the 7th floor. The first is because you are excitedly awaiting news of the birth of a healthy, full term baby just one floor up. The other reason you go to the 7th floor is because you have a critically ill and very fragile baby in the NICU. In that one space, the shared waiting area, the emotions laid forth are almost bi-polar. On one couch sits a family with pink ... View the Post
Statistics of a Preemie Playdate
Statistics. I took one course of Elementary Statistics in college and barely passed. Most days the words coming out of the professor's mouth, while clearly the English language, did not come together in my brain as anything comprehensible. The scientific process by which you gather, analyze, interpret and present credible quantifiable data? Not my thing. I've told you before, Darrin does the math in this family. But in a medical crisis, statistics mean everything. Don't they? A few weekends ... View the Post